In daily life, sometimes when we sit alone to meditate, we often wonder: “Where does the greatest suffering in human life come from?”.
If only in society everyone was the same, everyone owned the same property, surely the concept of rich and poor would not exist. So, if we get out of the concept of rich and poor, don’t get caught up in the concept of society, we see that material enjoyment is not the biggest reason why we are here in this world, we will never lament.
People often say that poverty is suffering, poverty, but few people say that rich is miserable. In fact, the poor have the suffering of the poor, and the rich also have the suffering of the rich. Poor people because they do not accept poverty, hate poverty, want to be rich, so they suffer. The rich are afraid of not having enough assets to make others respect, fear of bankruptcy, fear of others taking advantage of or harming them, so they suffer. In comparison, the suffering of the rich is more complicated and difficult than that of the poor. If only in society everyone was the same, everyone owned the same property, surely the concept of rich and poor would not exist. So, if we get out of the concept of rich and poor, don’t get caught up in the concept of society, we see that material enjoyment is not the biggest reason why we are here in this world, we will never lament.
Lust is the source of suffering
Extreme is the same, people often combine extreme with suffering and suffering. While hardship itself is not necessarily suffering. Just because we add our own attitude, we resist it, we want to not have to work hard but still have everything like everyone else, so we suffer. We only compare, demand, but do not need to find out the deep root cause of why we are so miserable. I have seen people who just need their loved one to recover from a serious illness, even though that person cannot continue to work, they are still willing to give their whole life to protect. There are people who do rescue work, they know that jumping into the fierce fire, going underground or walking through arrows and arrows will be very dangerous to their lives, but because of love, they do not consider it as suffering. Although many people think that the extreme mind is really suffering, having to think about everything to be able to shoulder the work; But in the current economic downturn, it is already very happy to have work to do, to think about.
And the thing that we often complain to each other the most is hurt, every pain is to suffer, as an inalienable truth. Someone slapping us in the face can hurt us, but if we’re sorry for that person and are ready to accept it, the slap won’t hurt us. Over here, with a contemptuous attitude, they “given” a slap to humiliate me in front of everyone, I’m really miserable. The business failed, the money was lost, who doesn’t feel pain because it’s the sweat and tears that we have been saving for many years. But from that pain to suffering is still quite a distance, if we know the cause of failure and fully accept it. And perhaps, the most unifying pain of life is separation, so it is often compared to the intestines cut in half, “the painful end”. But if we realize that merging and dissolving is a matter of predestined relationships, maybe it is also an opportunity for two people to look back and change themselves to create a new predestined relationship in a better future.
Life always has things that suit us but are contrary to other people’s preferences, or satisfy other people’s needs but are contrary to our hearts. Even we ourselves have “rainy mornings and afternoons” that we don’t understand. There are things that we used to hate and hate but now like. There are things that we used to be very passionate about, but now we are bored and do not want to look at them. There are issues that we used to look down on, but now feel are very important. Assuming all our wishes are fulfilled, then what will we become and what will this life be like? Yet we keep trying to demand it, but we rarely consider carefully whether our wishes are really reasonable, that is, are they necessary and consistent with our abilities or current circumstances. our present, and whether it affects or relates to others. So most of the suffering we often complain about is, in fact, just because it doesn’t go our way. It is clear that our suffering is not necessarily the suffering of others. So instead of complaining “it’s so miserable”, we should say “it’s not what I want”. This call will touch the consciousness to help us look back at our reaction habits instead of chasing other objects. From there, we will understand that the concept of “life is suffering” is just a way of thinking, or just a prejudice.
We should never forget that we are not an isolated individual, but we are always subject to the interaction of many surrounding resources, from friends and family to society and the vast world. No matter how talented we are, no matter how well prepared we are, unsatisfactory things happen naturally. When there is success, there must be defeat; when there is agreement, there must be dissolution. Why do we only want success and union, and defeat and dissolution for whom? When we are lucky, why don’t we ask ourselves if we really deserve this achievement and should accept it, but when we are unlucky, we cry loudly, demanding justice. We have enjoyed too many gifts of the universe, then from time to time, the universe takes it back and divides it for others, thinking that is also natural, but there is nothing to lose.
For huge losses, of course, it takes time to accept and balance. But there are things that are so normal, if not trivial, that we also grieve, that’s our fault. It’s also hard when it rains, it’s hard to get stuck in traffic, it’s hard to miss an appointment, it’s also hard to eat food that doesn’t fit your mouth, it’s also hard to grow taller than you want, it’s also hard to get old quickly, it’s also hard to be loved by many people. … All because my greed was too great but my internal strength was too weak, so it drowned me in that suffering. Let’s not blame the situation. No one can make us miserable if we have a right understanding and a large enough capacity for acceptance. In order to have that broad acceptance, we need to know how to “reduce” our unnecessary desires. Even with the right things, if without it we can still live firmly and happily, we should also try to refuse so that our mind is less dependent on the circumstances, so that when the circumstances change, we will still be disaffected. motion.
Transformation of suffering
In addition, we should also practice for ourselves how to face difficulties, or create for ourselves a way of thinking, a way of life that does not expect too much safety, so that the endurance in us quickly grows. A child grows up in an environment that is too full of protection, gets whatever he wants, so when he enters life, he doesn’t have any experience to cope with difficulties and adversities, just a small impact. like being criticized that it was wobbly and wanted to give up immediately. Just like the plants that grow on loose soil that look lush and green, but just need to be broken by a strong wind; And the trees that grow on the rocks of the mountains, though thin in appearance, have a very strong grip, and no storm can knock them down. So we cannot pray for life not to push us into harsh situations, but we can make ourselves not fall before the storms of life with a steady heart.
To have a strong heart, we have to stop chasing after things we like and try to accept things we don’t like. Like or dislike are both expressions of emotions serving the ego in the moment, just need to adjust the perception, that emotion will immediately disintegrate. Let’s not rush to complain about living without enjoying, what’s the point of living? No one forbids us to enjoy. But everything has its price, we just take care of the weak ego and then don’t ask why we keep suffering. Of course, a person who has a solid heart does not matter how much fame or profit they have, they have the courage to overcome fame and gain or use fame and gain usefully for the world. However, in fact, the number of people who have the idea to let go of the habit of enjoyment is very rare, and the number of people who can do it is even rarer. Especially in today’s society, people dare to overthrow the moral stronghold to fight for rights, regardless of the consequences for themselves, their children or others. That’s why people live more and more miserable. Because of that, suffering has unintentionally become an endless epic, and no one has not once hummed it.
Yes, suffering is an undeniable reality, but its nature is inherently unstable. Suffering is not the default nature of this life. In fact, there is no such thing as suffering, it’s just that our mental machinery is malfunctioning, so it has created opposing reactions against situations that it considers to be contrary. Fortunately, that mental machine is a flexible assembly that can be adjusted. Starting from the right awareness again about what concerns me always correlates with everything so that it does not continue to create selfish reactions. At the same time, it needs to have the ability to observe and analyze very closely the habits that we have built in the past to the present. The process of dismantling those negative mentality is the process of overcoming suffering. The less narcissistic hurt, the less suffering. Stop thinking about the ego is the end of suffering.
Suffering is the material that nurtures love
After all, we need to be grateful for suffering. Because suffering both helps us to realize what happiness is, and helps our tolerance to grow so that we can unleash all our hidden survival instincts, as well as…